Dumpster Diving

Oh no, More than Words. That was the first song I ever learned on guitar. My guitar teacher at the time forced me to learn it because it "always got him laid at parties." I wasn't so concerned with that when I was in 7th grade. If I could only remember it now...

Bette Midler's "Wind Beneath My Wings" and "Under the Boardwalk" from Beaches. Oh yea.

Whoa, whoa, whoa—you included Sledgehammer on your list? So is one of the greatest albums of all time. Nothing guilty about it! :D

You want more? How about every song on the Vice City soundtrack?

Remove Sledgehammer, insert the bizzareness of Was (Not Was)' "Walk The Dinosaur". Made all the guilty pleasure by being on the same album (Walk the Dog) as "Somehere In America," still one of the most wierdly sad songs ever.

Anything by Milli Vanilli...

Oh hell ya.

"Relax" by Frankie Goes To Hollywood

"Come on Eileen" by Dexie's Midnight Runners

I HATE those songs!

I'm gonna third the "remove Sledgehammer" movement. And instead, suggest replacing it with:

Rosanna by Toto

(I always thought the line "Meet you all the way" was "Need to hum away...")

I could think of hundreds, but one that I find particularly galling would be "Ebony and Ivory" by Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney. Oh, and anything by Pink Floyd.

You forgot that other gem by 10cc, I'm Not In Love.

What else... I'm not sure if some of this stuff is in the AMS, but here goes...

Crazy Love, Poco
Barely Breathing, Duncan Sheik
Say It Isn't So, Hall & Oates
Sharing The Night Together, Dr. Hook
When You're In Love With A Beautiful Woman, Dr. Hook
Leader Of The Band, Dan Fogelberg (really, his whole catalog works here)
Escape (The Pina Colada Song) - Rupert Holmes

...my brain hurts, but I'm sure there are more. Enjoy!

For my money, it just doesn't get any better, I mean, worse, than "Wind of Change"...some may credit the collapse of the East German economy, but to those in the know, it was the Scorpions that brought down the Berlin Wall.

Edie Brickell and Supertramp make your throat gag? Oh, well. I'd re-file most of those songs as Guilty Pleasures: songs you pretend to hate around your friends, but secretly sing to yourself on the way home.

Hey, leave Chris De Burgh alone!!
Naw, I'm just kidding... go nuts.

But if you play guitar, can you hit that Amos Garrett solo on "Midnight At The Oasis"...? ;-)

Most of these tunes were calculated to hit a big public market when they were created, and if you were outside their zone then they can seem a little strange. But a lot of the music before the 1960s was stuff the musicians liked, without that overriding goal of hitting a mass market.

I'm currently reading Joseph Lanza's "Elevator Music", which is a history of "functional music"... really changing my perspective, useful if you've got an interest in this area.

One? Three: "Sledgehammer" [ditto whoever wanted to sub in "Walk the Dinosaur"], "More Than Words," "Circle." Oh, dear God ...

Dream Weaver by Gary Wright

http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?playlistId=168152&selectedItemId=168136

Here's my beef with Sledgehammer -- So is a great album, with the glaring, painfully obvious attempts at hit singles known as "Sledgehammer" and "Big Time." Both are horribly out of tune with the rest of the album. I appreciate lots of Peter Gabriel, but 'Sledgehammer' is just unbearable. But...lumping it in with "Half Breed" may be a bit unfair, I'll admit. :)

1. Teena Marie - Lover Girl
2. Atlantic Starr - Secret Lover
3. Karyn White - Superwoman
4. Nu Shooz - I Can't wait
5. Anything by Celine Dion

I could on, but why?

I have been hit by similar bouts of love-hate nostalgia with notables such as Boston's "More Than a Feeling" and well, let's just leave the others as my little secret.

Andy: anything by Pink Floyd? Come now. I'd let "Sledgehammer" pass into this list long before.

eye of the tiger - survivor
we built this city - starship
cruel summer - bananarama (karate kid!)

seventeen, winger
vice city soundtrack (nice call shaun)
renegade, styx
i can't go for that, hall & oates
into the night, benny mardones

and andy, lay off "the floyd" ; )

As great as this list is, it doesn't even scratch the surface.

1. "Crush On You" - The Jets
2. "Digital Display" and "Oh Sheila"- Ready For The World
3. "Peace In Our Time" - Eddie Money
4. "Every Woman In The World" - Air Supply
5. "All Cried Out" - Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam (With Full Force!!!!)

oh, dude... i have a secret shame of actually owning spandau ballet's "greatest" hits CD with songs like, "Lifeline", and "True". I'm sure those songs would make someone's list.

others:
* "say you, say me" by lionel richie
* "don't worry, be happy" bobby mcferin
* "shot through the heart" bon jovi
* "too shy" ka ja goo goo

too many to list...

"Afternoon Delight" by Starland Vocal Band

Discussions on musical tastes are futile. In few instances does the "one man's crap is another man's treasure" (or at the inverse) axiom apply as much as on this one. I confess I must have some records in my music collection that I'd be too ashamed to admit I own here, but what the heck.

Still, I have few objections to Todd's list and his appreciations :-). Must be the fact that I work with a partner stuck in the 80s. I'd drop Peter Gabriel from that one though.

Youve all forgotten (im 25 btw) Europe - final countdown and Living on a prayer.

Broken wings by mister mister hell yeah that song rocks

if you love all this music you should consider getting the vice city sound track

Oh man... these are all gems. The sad thing is that I know for a fact that i will go home and download nearly all of these (if i don't already have them) and put them into a playlist, based on decade. A few that will be added to the list that weren't included on Todd's:

Red Rubber Ball - Cyrkle
Chevy Van - Sammy Johns
Patches -Clarence Carter
The Night Chicago Died - Paper Lace
Magic - Pilot

Aww, gee... What'd you have to do that for? Now I can't stop whistling "More Than Words."

I swear the video will be in my dreams tonight.

"...to-show-me-how-you-feeeeeel..."

I did this to my co-worker a few weeks ago. She said she had Jess's Girl by Rick Springfield stuck in her head, so I waited a half hour and blasted it. A few days later, she said she was addicted to the iTunes Music Store.

i would rather see some really bad songs like rockwell´s "somebody´s watching me" instead of a pearl like sledgehammer.
but nothing could top any single song of a german duo called "modern talking". every single song sounds like a sudden deafness burned on cd. they even don´t got the way into itunes music store, in order to prevent a damage of the sound system.

aaarrrgggggg!! Now I have a hundred bad songs pinging around my brain...wish I hadn't checked in on this one! Would like to add some more, but my brain can't think thru all these nasty tunes.

Todd's right about Peter Gabriel and the So albumn.

God, I try, I try, I try... and then someone goes and does a column like this that has me buying songs that I absolutely love to hate. Now I'm paying again for Scandal and Quarterflash. Didn't I buy those singles in the 80s & 90s, and threw them out when I got roommates who eschewed pop music and introduced me to the Smiths and Tom Waits. This a great list for both the obvious groans, and the sneaky, ohh I have to go hear that song now. But dude, another vote to remove Peter Gabriel from the list, though admittedly Sledgehammer was the most overplayed song off that album.

I'm glad I live in Canada where I can't buy music from the iTunes Store, there is so many BAD song that I wish I own, I would probably go broke.

I'm surprise that nobody include anything by ABBA or Duran Duran/Arcadia. I'm not ashamed to say the True by Spandau Ballet will always be on my list of GOOD song from that period, ok maybe I should be ashamed ;-)

How I could I have forgotten - "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off To Have A Good Time" by Jermaine Stewart and "Heartbeat" by Don Johnson, yes THAT Don Johnson.

the worst thing though.

when your at work
no headphones

and you have

"kharma kharma kharma camelion"

just that one line looping non stop all day
one of the worst days of my life

Sorry Todd, Sledgehammer is good - after all it is about sex and it had a great video!

Some to to add would be Africa - think it is by Toto
I just called to say I loved you - Stevie Wonder
Ebony and Ivory - Macca and Jacko

Not sure if they are in the ITMS but hey they are rubbish!!!! :-)

WTF is your problem with P.G.'s Sledgehammer? Wipe its ass with any crap of the bleached out weirdo Jackson.

Anything from Huey Lewis and The News...

Yikes, look what I started with the Sledgehammer veto. I can respect your opinion Todd even though I don't agree with it. :D

How about adding Rock You Like A Hurricane by the Scorpions? When Hurricane Floyd hit Savannah, GA in '99 and the entire city evacuated, what passed for the local rock station played that tune 16 times in a row before going off the air.

BTW how do you find the direct link to a particular album/song?

HAHAHAH OMG this is awesome. Okay so I'm not really from that generation but I totally have an appreciation for Martika! HAHA.

RE: "BTW how do you find the direct link to a particular album/song?"

In the iTMS, right click on a track, and select "Copy iTunes Music Store URL." The URL is now on your clipboard, so you can paste it anywhere you want (like here).

iTunes Link Maker FAQ
http://www.apple.com/itunes/linkmaker/faq/

Must require Panther because I just updated to 4.1 and the only contextual menu items I get are iTunes Music Store Help, Get Info, and Copy (which just copies the id3 tag of the selected song not the path). I'll have to try it when I get home.

Or I could just use Josh's link. ;D

"seventeen, winger"

Oh come on, if I ever get remairried to an underage stripper I want this playing at the wedding!

It's not just Pink Floyd that I despise, any number of 70's "experimental prog-rockers" could have qualified. Rush, Genesis, Yes even. ;)

Wake me up before you go go,
Don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo.
Wake me up before you go go,
I don't wanna miss it when you hit that high
Wake me up before you go go,
'Cause I'm not planning on going solo.
Wake me up before you go go,
Take me dancing tonite.
I wanna hit that high...

I would add "I Shot the Sheriff", "Close the Window, Come Alive", "Red, Red Wine", "Piano in the Dark" and anything by Kim Carnes (Bette Davis Eyes, etc.). The raspy voice makes my own throat ache!

O.K. Last one from me. I actually downloaded and listened to Survivor's "Burning Heart" (I assume it's the one from the Rocky movie where he fights the Russian boxer Drago).

They were the first (and only) band who saw Rocky's fight as a metaphor for the US vs. USSR Cold War. Plus they use the word "paradox" in the song.

jeez...

these posts made me access the the music store for the first time... innaresting

How come no one's mentioned muskrat love? It's just the world's greatest love song is all.

Lauri: “Red, Red Wine”

I hope your referring to that dreadful UB40 version and not the Tony Tribe original which was/is a classic bit of roots reggae

Didn't see Heat of the Moment by Asia listed. Enjoy. Or not.

Interesting tidbit: the daughter of Chris De Burgh ("Lady in Red") just won Miss World. (She was Miss Ireland.)

Sheesh, you forgot 'Cry Wolf' by A-ha !

99 Luftballons by Nena. Sadly, it isn't on iTunes yet.

Excuse me, Mr Dominey - Minnie Riperton?! You lost me...and the Pointer Sisters is dubious at best.
Here's one - Coward of the County:Kenny Rogers
And that Pina Collada guy too...

TUM, TUM, TUM, TUM, TUM, FLASH AHA...

General Kaka Flash Gordon approaching
What do you mean Flash Gordon approaching?
Open fire ... all weapons
Dispatch war rocket Ajax to bring back his body...

TUM, TUM, TUM, TUM, TUM, FLASH AHA...

Well, After the Fire's "Der Komissar" isn't in iTunes Music Store but if it were...

;0

The real Muskrat Love!

...which I actually like, btw; along with Pablo Cruise, Maria Muldaur, Seals and Crofts, etc. etc.

This is fun though...

"Just Remember I Love You" by Firefall and "Kiss You All Over" by Exile get me singing in the shower every time.

Hungry eyes, here in South Africa we have another laungauge called afrikaans, they made an afrikaans ver of hungry eyes. If you thought the english one was bad, O my goodness image one that is made up a rough Dutch/English launguage sung by people who should be shot on site

"Wonderful tonight" Eric Clapton. When you can play the guitar so well, why sing something so bad?
"Road to hell" Chris Rea. For starters.

Oh sweet jesus...

http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?playlistId=3912425&selectedItemId=3912421

Back in Black, hillbilly style!

Not really in the same vein, but bad enough to mention...

Back in Black (hillbilly style)

If these are the songs you hate, brother you've got shitty taste in music.

well... there's a million I could add... How about nearly EVERY song by Neil Sedaka with the exception of "Bad Blood" -which only apears on iTunes as a pretty decent cover. The original actually has some yarbles, so it's hard to believe Neil did it.

"I Guess That's Why They Call it The Blues" bad bad elton. "Groovy Kind of Love" all versions...
"After The Lovin'"- don't care who did that... "Say You Say Me"... ouch.. i hurt myself... Anything by Peabo Bryson and Kenny G

Remove "Sledgehammer"... Hayseed dixie rox... Kiss and ac/dc covers, and all your 70s AOR favorites.

BTW... "Battery acid bile"-- great freaking line!

yes, please remove "Sledgehammer"